Dove of peace emerges from its slumber

FOURTEEN years on from the historic signing of the Declaration of Principles on the White House lawn, renewed hope emerged today of finally ending the Israel/Palestine dispute.

President Bush, flanked by Israeli Premier Ehud Olmert and Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas talked peace at the US Naval Academy at Annapolis, Maryland.

Many issues still remain to be resolved: The future of Jerusalem, the 4.5million Palestinian refugees, the 450,000 Isreali settlers in the West Bank ...

But at least they're talking.

One can only pray that sometime soon the dream of a Palestinian state neighbouring a secure Israel will finally be realised, with the help, of course, of Tony Blair, newly appointed Middle East peace envoy.

Gentlemen, we salute you.

Eet's just not cricket!

    

CHRISTOPHER Martin-Jenkins to star in new BBC drama
The Company, broadcast tonight?

Sadly not, for 'tis only his lookalike Michael Keaton, Batman himself!

CMJ's out in Sri Lanka for the Test series which starts next Saturday.

They may have encountered snakes snoozing away on the outfield in their last tour game, but I bet the England players are glad they didn't encounter this scary scorpion:



Sends a shiver down yer spine!

Sun sets on England's Euro campaign

A BUNCH of useless, greedy tossers are on the pitch ... they think it's all over, it is now.

England are out of Euro 2008.

Golden generation? More like the gold-digging generation, fleecing England fans for all they're worth.



At least Steve McClaren will get the sack.

And hopefully Brian Barwick, the pen-pusher who appointed him, will be booted out too.

Same difference?

    

    

SO, WHO will emerge triumphant in the battle to succeed Sir Menzies Campbell as leader of the Liberal Democrats?

Chris Who or Calamity Clegg? The Gordon Brown wannabe or the David Cameron doppelgänger?

In any case, does anyone really care? After all, X Factor muppets like the aforementioned group get more votes each week than the Lib Dems do in a year.

Judging by their set-to on this afternoon's Politics Show ...



... perhaps they'd be better off setting up their own reality show, I'm a Liberal Democrat, get me out of here!

Golan scales the heights to save McClaren's skin

Tel Aviv, European Championship Qualifiers, Group B:
Israel 2-1 Russia

---

ENGLAND'S Euro 2008 dream was back on track tonight following Israel's dramatic injury-time win over Russia.

Steve McClaren's men now require only a draw against Croatia on Wednesday to qualify.

Omer Golan scored with virtually the last kick of the game to finally break Russia's resolve and leave their fate out of their own hands.

Golan latched onto Elyaniv Barda's through ball, breaking through the Russian back-line to slot the ball coolly under Vladimir Gabulov and re-ignite England's Alpine adventure.

    

Defeat was all the more crushing for Gus Hiddink's team following Dmitri Sychev's shot against the post just seconds before Golan’s winner.

Barda had given the hosts an early lead with a neat finish – expertly clipping the ball over Gabulov – only for Diniyar Bilyaletdinov to equalise midway through the second half from Andrei Arshavin's pass.

But it proved too little as Golan's last gasp strike reprieved England and their beleagured manager.

Star man: Golan (Israel); Entertainment: ***

Watch highlights of today's game on Match of the Day tonight on
BBC One at 10:20.

Mathemagician to the rescue!

HE'S not the kind of magician who does tricks, he's a mathemagician!

And, unlike the pointy-head in Grade School Confidential, he really does know how to make a remainder disappear.

Pupils at Robert Mellors Primary School in Nottingham have been marvelling at the mysteries of the universe thanks to headmistress Donna Chambers, who's come up with a novel way of teaching maths.

"We are just a little school who let the children decide how they want to learn," said Miss Chambers.

    

"With maths, the teacher will say 'today we are learning how to do inverse operation'. They put on their Harry Potter hat and wands, and work it out in their books."

Year three pupil Lauren, bedecked in purple Potter-style hat, said: "It's really good and it has got loads of magic spells and different characters in it."

"It's made school a lot easier and better," added classmate Chantelle. "Everybody likes going to school now."

They shall not grow old, as we that are left grow old; Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn

At the going down of the sun and in the morning,
We will remember them.

When you go home tell them of us and say -
For your tomorrow we gave our today.

Hasti-low vista, Brummie!

    

CLEVER men undone by moments of madness.

Enoch Powell, Tory MP for Wolverhampton South West, Saturday, April 20th, 1968, and now, nearly four decades on, Nigel Hastilow, who was tonight forced to resign as Conservative party PPC for Halsowen and Rowley Regis.

Will the Tories never learn?