The Wanker

CHRIS GRAYLING'S likening of the streets of Britain to The Wire is as misleading as it is fanciful, and leads one to wonder whether he's ever seen an episode of it or is merely talking street in order to sound hip.

Take last night's episode, for example, which featured:-

• A detective planting evidence on a dead man to try and implicate a suspect

• The same 'bunky' making music with a 'ho' in some car park after going on an all-night bender

• Police swigging hip-flasks full of Jameson's Irish Whiskey while on duty

• A rookie female detective investigating a triple-homicide all on her own

• The chief of police doctoring crime figures in order to impress the Mayor

• The Mayor leaking this to the press and lining up his stooge as Commissioner

• A couple of 'Mopes' torturing an old man to death to find out their rival's hideout

• A church minister laundering 'cheese' and taking a cut for himself

• Senior officers writing-off the murders of homeless people and not investigating them properly

Sound familiar? Reminiscent of your town or village?!

Corrupt police, politicians and preachers, is this really what the Shadow Home Secretary, the Shadow Home Secretary, thinks of Britain today?! This isn't some irrelevant swivel-eyed whack-job we're talking about here, but the man who could conceivably be our next Home Secretary.

Maybe the next time Mr Grayling is asked whether Britain really is like The Wire, he'll think twice before answering "Well I think the answer to that is yes."

As they say on the streets of Baltimore, what a c***!

• BBC Two: Watch 'The Wire' tonight at 11:20
• Wikipedia: All you need to know about it